If you’re reading this right now you’ve made it into adulthood and no doubt survived middle school bullying and most likely bullying in high school. We all have come out “relatively” unscathed hopefully. But just because we came out with just a few cuts and scrapes doesn’t mean the emotional trauma has clearly left. There are serious short-term and long-term effects of bullying.
Whether you were bullied by a girl or a boy the hurt was just as real. Most boys seem to bully with physical aggression, pushing, shoving or using pranks and other means to embarrass and harass other boys seen as “not Alpha Male enough”. The leader of the gang stays “top dog” through fights and intimidation but it’s not just the boys doing the bullying.
Girls bully in groups or “cliques” and rule the other girls by using rumors, intimidation gossipping, and ostracization. The girls work their “gangs” by using relational bullying, back-stabbing and name calling. Girl bullies can be much harder to spot because it’s done through whispers instead of shoves.
Here are 3 Tips to Help your Daughter not become a bully.
Expose her to Diversity. Many girls have never been exposed to anyone different than themselves. Try to volunteer at a women’s resource center or go to culturally diverse festivals and films. If her world is very small she will have trouble relating to what other people may be going through. Teach her kindness and empathy, and that different isn’t bad.
Encourage Healthy Friendships. Teach here what toxic friends and fake people act like. Always encourage her to be herself, if she feels pressured to change and fit in let her know it may be a clique and those true friends will always accept her just how she is.
Monitor her Cell Phone and Internet Usage. Check in on where your daughter goes online and who she hangs out with while she’s there. Put limits on sites and usage. Monitor her social media accounts. You wouldn’t let your daughter go to a busy street downtown on a Saturday night and hang out in the alley by herself; but, you’d be shocked who lurks in some of the places she hangs out online.
Till next time,
Whenever you’re ready here’s another way we can help you. If you are interested in monitoring your child’s social media interactions for bullying, check out www.bullipatrol.com a company founded by a concerned Mom passionate about ending cyberbullying.